Top Five Things That Will Make Me Instantly NOT Want To Read A Book

The title of this post is slightly misleading because I don’t want to mention all the things that “instantly” turn me off to a book. I am keeping the title because that’s the theme for today’s Top Ten Tuesday. If you follow my blog it should be obvious that I’m not into erotica or zombie fiction. This blog is called Exploring Classics for a reason. I am not “absolutely” turned off by the following things, but I need a good reason to read the book if it contains any of them. I may, for example, read a 14th century in-your-face allegory because it has historical significance. I will read nearly anything if it has historical significance or if it’s old enough. Who wouldn’t want to read zombie fiction from the 9th century?

Without further ado, here’s my list:

1) Pure Romance

I am OK with some romance in a novel, but I don’t like “romance” novels. I tend to avoid even well-written romances like Pride and Prejudice. Romances don’t do anything for me. I must be a block of wood 😉

2) Poor Writing

I am definitely not a great writer, but I am a language student. I have difficulty overlooking bad writing. I wish I could read a popular work without criticizing its writing style or plot structure. Unfortunately, I can no longer read books without analyzing the hell out of them.

3) Plot-Driven Books

Plots don’t do much for me. I read for theme and character. Consequently, I prefer books that most readers find torturous. Yes, I know I come across as pretentious, but that’s not my intention.

4) In-Your-Face Allegory

Allegory should be subtle. I enjoy exploring fiction. I want to be surprised and delighted when I discover a hidden allegory. Fiction should invite the reader to engage critically with the work. I can’t engage critically with obvious allegory.

5) Books By Celebrities

Movie stars and musicians tend to be poor writers, or they hire ghost writers. They clearly write books to make money. It’s all just materialism.  Blech! I’m glad they became rich and famous, but I don’t want to be rich and famous. I just don’t care about the lives of most celebrities. I don’t look up to them or care about their teachings. Cults of personality disgust me. Rich and famous people pretend that they are in solidarity with the poor so that they can remain rich and famous. It’s all just posturing. They pretend that the wealthy necessarily work harder than the poor. (Can you tell that this aspect of American society makes me angry? I’d better stop here.)